procrastination and talent

Everyone wants to be successful right? We all have aspirations and goals of what we want to achieve in our lives.

But, sometimes we have no motivation to do anything productive towards our goals and that's where the problem begins. If we don't do anything productive towards our goals we will achieve nothing too. It sucks I know and I have been so lazy lately. Not like OMGGGG I haven't studied in an hour I'M GOING TO FAIL. when I say I've been lazy lately this means that I am in my final year in high school and when I get home from school or on the weekends I just procrastinate ALL.THE.TIME. and I don't really know if its just a rebellious stage? but I just haven't had any motivation lately and I know its bad. I'm sure everyone knows the things that are bad in their lives but still continue to do them.

For example; the people who smoke surely know that smoking is destroying their lungs and could potentially kill them but then why would they still continue to smoke as much as a packet a day or even more? Is it because smoking has become an addiction to them? Does that mean that I am addicted to procrastinating? because if it does lord help me!

Honestly, I don't know why I procrastinate so much during this time where my whole 12 years of schooling is on the line of a number that would determine what I could do in the future. Maybe it scares me. I don't really know why I am so willing to throw all those years away.

Many people say that I'm smart or good academically and I'm not saying this to boast about my grades or how well I do in school but there are many times that I think they don't really know me at all. In primary school I used to always try pretty hard in schoolwork but lately there hasn't been much effort on my end. And even though they say 'It'll be okay in the end. Don't worry!' I seriously doubt myself sometimes. Just like in Grey's Anatomy when Christina wasn't studying for her boards there wasn't any way for her to pass on pure talent. And it's true. No matter how much talent you have or how much luck you possess there is no way that you can pass the final year of high school "nicely" with talent alone. Blood, sweat and tears come to mind though.